"Western Beverages"

by Cindy

Here in the UAE alcohol is fairly difficult to buy. For my city/emirate, it is illegal to transport alcohol unless you have an alcohol license. Most people don't go to the trouble because the likelihood of getting caught is slim to none. In an effort to do the right thing, I went to the trouble and trouble it was!

I do most of the grocery shopping and errand running so Jeff and I decided that it made the most sense for me to get the license. I spoke with our HR department here at the University about what needs to happen. The head of HR gave me directions to the Police Station and a checklist of things I would need - multiple visa pictures, copies of my passport and visa - and I needed a "No Objection Letter" from my husband.

I head out one morning around 9 AM and find my way to the proper office. The gentleman there was quite helpful in explaining step by step what I needed. [For the sake of explaining my story, I will call this guy Ahmed.] First, I needed to go downstairs to pay for the police clearance form and bring my receipt back upstairs to get the actual form. I went down to the cashier who sent me to the line next to him. Once at the front of that line, the guy took my 50 AED and gave me what looked like a gift card. I then went and stood in line at the cashier who took my "gift card" and gave me a receipt (definitely not sure what that was all about). I went back upstairs to Ahmed with the receipt.

Ahmed then gave me the police clearance form. I needed to take this back downstairs and get it typed in Arabic. I stood in line at the type writers and they told me I needed to go across the street. I wasn't sure what for but the typing place across the street was on the map the University gave me so I assumed the University figured this might happen. Once to the typing store, I wasn't sure what I needed so I just handed them my whole stack. They, too, couldn't figure out what I might need so they typed up Jeff's 'No Objection Letter' in Arabic. I paid 50 AED and headed back to Ahmed because I'm really not sure what I should be doing. He looks through my paperwork, seems to nod at the 'No Objection Letter' in Arabic and tells me to sign it. [At this point I'm really wondering what the letter actually says. It makes no sense that I would sign a letter that says I/my husband have no objection to me drinking alcohol. Isn't that obvious since I'm here trying to get a license to buy alcohol?!?!?!] Ahmed again sends me to the Police Station type writer line. This time the guy completed my police clearance form, collected 15 AED and sent me to the police line. While in this line, an officer came and got me out of line and told me to go to the top floor, Ladies Only Room, and they would take care of me there. (At this point I'm thinking why didn't I think of that? Ladies Only lines are usually short and efficient.) Once in the Ladies Only Area, she took my paper work and told me to come back in two days. But first, she said, call to make sure everything is ready. It was about 1 PM by this time and I had reached my limit! I didn't figure I would be able to tolerate this for two days in one week so I put off my return.

In the mean time, we had a party at our house so I made a run to the liquor store without my license and seriously questioned whether I would ever return to the Police Station to finish the process!

After a couple of weeks I was thinking I could stomach another trip to the Police Station so I did call to confirm my paperwork was ready. They said it was and told me it had been ready for a "long time."

It has now been about a month since my first visit and I am bound and determined to do the right thing and get my license. I again head to the Police Station around 9 AM (parking is easier in the morning) and head back to the Ladies Only area. They can't find my paper work. She tells me I need to head downstairs to see my friend Ahmed. I go back to see him, he recognizes me, and tells me I have to go back to Ladies Only. I return. They find someone who speaks better English and try to get me to start the whole process over again. "No way Jose" as we say in Texas! I show them my receipt from last time and so they know that they are the ones who have lost the paper work. They want to know who I worked with last time and I try to describe her. They respond with "the fat one?" Yes, the fat one. [This is how we work over here, while it might seem rude, we were both immediately able to identify with whom I was working.] Somewhere in the midst of all of this , they take me back to the Director to try and figure out what to do. I return to the front desk and the lady keeps saying, "I'm sorry but we don't have your paper." She's going through the five papers on the top of the pile and ignoring the rest of the pile. She finally picks up the whole pile and guess what...my paper work is in the pile. "Oh, your paper work is in Arabic!" "Yes, it is, you told me that you require it to be in Arabic." Shukran, Shukran, Shukran I tell her, grab my paperwork and head back down to Ahmed - the one person who seems to know what is going on.

Ahmed smiles when I appear with my paper and let's me know that I have completed the first (!) step. At this point, I am afraid to ask how many more steps there are, I might likely walk out never to return. He explains that the first step was the police clearance and the second step is the application. I need to go downstairs and pay 100 AED for the application and return with the receipt. I head down to the cashier (straight to the cashier this time and not the "gift card" guy) who takes my money and gives me receipt. Back up stairs.... I hand the receipt to Ahmed and he in turn gives me an application to fill out. There is a part of the application where the employer is supposed to sign and verify how much I make each month. I had been told by the University that I would have to bring this form back to them. I fill out the application and put an amount in the salary field and pray that Ahmed doesn't ask me to go back to my employer. I think he feels sorry for me this time so he lets it slide and begins to process my paperwork.

Side note: I had to put on the form that I am a housewife since that's what my visa says but the law is that I can't have a liquor license unless I have an income. Technically your liquor license allows you to buy a certain dollar amount of alcohol each year and that amount is a % of your income. The more your annual salary, the more liquor you can buy.

A guy was reading over Ahmed's shoulder and he pointed out that I shouldn't be able to get a licence since I am a housewife. Ahmed, however, knew that I worked (we are buddies at this point) and that I teach at the American University. I was actually tracking with their conversation (in Arabic) so I spoke up and said in Arabic that my husband and I are both teachers at American University. They were shocked when I spoke Arabic and I think I gained some 'street cred' with them at that point. No guarantee on whether I said everything correctly but they knew what I was trying to say!

Once my application was complete Ahmed sent me back downstairs to actually pay for my license, 500 AED. Straight to the cashier this time, not the gift card guy and back to Ahmed. Now Ahmed pulls out the license and I know we might be reaching the final stage. I start quietly singing the Hallelujah chorus. Ahmed is quite meticulous abut putting together my license. He glues my picture into the back and then staples it in , weird, I know. Puts a few stamps on it and tells me we have to wait for someone to sign it. Ahmed is sitting around waiting and waiting and waiting. Eventually the guy who leaned over Ahmed's shoulder earlier makes a phone call on my behalf and a man appears to sign my license. Finally! I have all I need. I thank Ahmed profusely and run for the hills! I am finally legit. If the liquor store wasn't a 1.5 hour round trip I probably would have gone and bought a bottle of wine to celebrate!

The infamous receipts.

The pic inside, glued and stapled.

Side note: one thing that you may not know is that visa photos have to have a white background, you can't smile and you have to have your hair behind your ears. Next time you see some picture on the news of some supposed bad guy, remember the pictures don't really do our looks justice!