Deep South or Middle East?

We don't do the 1-hour church service over here. And we don't scatter right after church ends, either. Just because we're in the big city doesn't mean that we've forgotten what it means to be family.

Church takes up most of the day. And afterwards, everyone gets together for a big lunch - it usually lasts a while because we sit around talking, too. Cindy and I got home at around 4pm. And what did I eat today for lunch? Fried chicken - and then ice cream for dessert. Ahhhhhh.

















WE HAVE JESUS AND COLONEL SANDERS IN DUBAI.

It's a Small World After All

by Cindy

It is true that we have moved almost 10,000 miles away from home. However, upon arrival, we have found that we are not that far from people who come from similar places.

Here are some stories of people we have met and where they are from...


Prior to leaving Lubbock, we were calling around about people we could connect with once we arrived in the UAE. One of the people we called had been in Lubbock the previous day to take his daughter for a campus visit at Texas Tech University.

We found our church in the UAE through a friend who used to travel through Lubbock once a year and then moved to Al Ain, UAE for two years.

When visiting a church in Dubai, we introduced ourselves only to figure out that the guy sitting next to us is a Texas Tech Alumni with family still in Snyder, TX (population 10,783).

The pastor of one of the churches here already knew about us before we visited. His mother-in-law lives in Lubbock and goes to a dentist there who is a good friend of ours from our church in Lubbock.

At yet another place in town, we ran into a guy who is originally from Denver City, TX (population 3,985).


One of my students recommended a hair salon in town so I called and made an appointment with the first available stylist - she's Egyptian but went to college in Austin and her best friend is from Arlington. We spent the whole time talking about things to do in Arlington, TX!


We headed to India for a friend's wedding only to find that a former colleague of mine was visiting the same city in India at the same time! Here's a pic of me and Maruti in Hyderabad. Maruti now lives in Coppell, TX and has been there for 20 years.

Even though we are far away, we have discovered it is a small world after all.

There's No Place Like Home

by Cindy

Shortly after Jeff and I arrived we were wondering what it would take for this to feel like home. We didn't know if it would be a specific event, if one day we would wake up and feel "at home" or if over time we would gradually feel at home. I took a best guess and thought it might be when we were out and about in town and we began to run into people we know. I now know that for me, that makes it home.

This past weekend we headed into Sharjah to get our Emirate National ID. While waiting for our turn, we ran into a family that we know from campus. We had a great time 'chatting it up' (they are British) with them while we all waited. Once we finished up there, we headed to a mall in Dubai to get a gift for a family that had invited us into their home. While at the mall we ran into one of Jeff's students shopping with her mother.

In order to understand how unlikely this is, you have to first understand shopping in Dubai. There is more than 14 million square feet of shopping in the city. They do not just call them shopping malls but shopping resorts. The city boasts the largest mall in the world. To run into someone you know is not common at all.

So, I have decided that I am home. We are enjoying ourselves so much, why would we not call this home?

Single Ladies - Put a Ring on It

by Cindy

For any of you who have ever planned a wedding or been in a wedding you are aware of all of the details that go into the wedding. After visiting India, I thought I would add my American commentary to the wedding and comment on some of the experiences we had. Check out the pictures below or on my Facebook page.

· Assuming that all of the flowers at Naveen’s wedding were real, they dropped serious money on them. Flowers may be cheaper in India than in the States, but in the States, they would have spent well north of $100K on flowers alone.

· The wedding ceremony and reception were at Jaya Gardens, an outdoor venue in Hyderabad frequently used for weddings.

· As far as the ceremony goes, there was not a procession where her father gave her away but there were some similarities.

· The ceremony began with Naveen sitting in a chair and Kranthi on the floor behind him. Both were facing the guests. As the ceremony progressed, Naveen moved to the floor but still with his back to her. Eventually he turned around and at first there was a "sheet" being held up between them by family but eventually that sheet was removed and they were on the floor facing one another and eventually side by side.

· Part of the ceremony included a time where their clothes were stitched together symbolizing they had been married.

· There were presented as husband and wife and the receiving line began at that point. They had some really sweet chairs to sit in - they looked like thrones - I think American weddings should incorporate the chairs.

· It's common (at least in the part of India where we were) for married women to wear toe rings - usually one the second toe of each foot - to indicate that they are married.

· Also, married women almost always wear sarees. There are other forms of traditional Indian dress, but if you see an Indian woman in a saree, it usually means that she is married.

· There was NO point at which Jeff and I were left alone. We were constantly attended to by a family member or a very close friend of the family. When it came time for the receiving line, we were personally escorted. When it came time to eat, we simply sat down and people served us. When it came time to join the various ceremonies, we had seats at the front every time - seats of honor. It was an amazingly kind gesture, we really were honored to be there.

· To brag on my husband for a moment, apparently Naveen tried to have Jeff be a witness on the wedding certificate. It did not happen because you have to be an Indian National but I thought it was a great honor that Naveen would consider that and ask for it.

· There were 1,700 people that came to bless Naveen and Kranthi at some point through out the week long celebration. There was food and drink at every event - an abundant amount of food and drink at every event.

· There were three photographers and three videographers at the wedding ceremony and they filmed for hours. For each of the other five events, there was at least one photographer and one videographer. I cannot begin to count the number of pictures they will review or the number of hours they will watch video. At the very least, the event is well documented. Naveen and Kranthi will have many wonderful pictures to remember this beautiful celebration.

· Indian brides usually receive gold jewelry from family and friends as gifts before the wedding. As in, a LOT of gold jewelry. Kranthi wore probably about $100K in gold at the wedding. Each day she had on different jewelry. Here is an excerpt from a January 2009 National Geographic article about gold in India:

The gold ornaments come out of the velvet boxes one by one, family heirlooms that Nagavi, a 23-year-old Indian bride, always knew she would wear on her wedding day. The eldest daughter of a coffee plantation owner in the southern Indian state of Karnataka, Nagavi grew up marveling at the weddings that mark the merger of two wealthy Indian families. But not until the morning of her own arranged wedding to the only son of another coffee plantation family does she understand just how achingly beautiful the golden tradition can be.

By the time Nagavi is ready for her wedding, the university graduate with a predilection for jeans and T-shirts has been transformed into an Indian princess, shimmering in gold. An exquisitely crafted hairpiece is so heavy—five and a half pounds of gold—that it pulls her head back. Three gold necklaces and a dozen bangles act as effective counterweights. Wrapped in an 18-foot-long sari woven with thread dipped in gold, Nagavi walks slowly out of her home, trying to keep her balance as she tosses rice over her head in a traditional gesture of farewell.

The gold treasures Nagavi wears—along with the jewelry and saris packed in the trunk of the SUV taking her to the wedding hall—are not a traditional dowry. In this circle of coffee growers around the town of Chikmagalur, unlike in many poorer parts of the country, it is considered unseemly for a groom's family to make explicit demands. "This is seen as my 'share' of the family wealth," says Nagavi, gazing at the mil­lions of dollars of gold jewelry. As with any Indian wedding, the gold also serves to display the value she brings to the union. "With daughters, you have to start saving gold from the day they are born," says Nagavi's father, C. P. Ravi Shankar. "It's important to marry them off well."

Nowhere is the gold obsession more culturally entrenched than it is in India. Per capita income in this country of a billion people is $2,700, but it has been the world's runaway leader in gold demand for several decades. In 2007, India consumed 773.6 tons of gold, about 20 percent of the world gold market and more than double that purchased by either of its closest followers, China (363.3 tons) and the U.S. (278.1 tons). India produces very little gold of its own, but its citizens have hoarded up to 18,000 tons of the yellow metal—more than 40 times the amount held in the country's central bank.

India's fixation stems not simply from a love of extravagance or the rising prosperity of an emerging middle class. For Muslims, Hindus, Sikhs, and Christians alike, gold plays a central role at nearly every turning point in life—most of all when a couple marries. There are some ten million weddings in India every year, and in all but a few, gold is crucial both to the spectacle and to the culturally freighted transaction between families and generations. "It's written into our DNA," says K. A. Babu, a manager at the Alapatt jewelry store in the southwestern city of Cochin. "Gold equals good fortune."

· After the wedding ceremony, Kranthi returned to her home to gather her belongings and then her female family members escorted her to Naveen’s home. Considering how long everything lasts, this happened at about 3AM. Oddly enough, Kranthi's visa is not ready yet so Naveen is returning to America without her and she will come on December 17th. After Naveen leaves India, Kranthi will return to her family home and stay there until she leaves for America.

We were very blessed to have attended and there was not a moment that went by that we didn't know that they were blessed to have us there. We have some memories that will last a lifetime and look forward to seeing Naveen and Kranthi again - but who knows where that will be!!

India

Cindy and I went to Hyderabad, India this past week. We attended the wedding of one of my friends, Naveen Gudigantala. Naveen and I met at Texas Tech where we both went though the Ph.D. program together. Cindy and I had a great time and we’re definitely planning on going back to India soon. Here’s a little info on what we did, where we went, and what the wedding was like.

Day 1 – Wednesday – The Marriage Ceremony
We flew out of Sharjah at 12:05am. The flight to Hyderabad was a little over 3 hours, so we landed at 5:30am local time and were met by the driver that Naveen and his family hired for us (this is a necessity in India - if you think we should have just rented a car, you've never been to India. Naveen doesn't even drive there anymore). We headed into town to check into the Marriott. Cindy and I got some sleep, had a fantastic lunch of local Indian cuisine at the hotel, and took afternoon tea. We arrived at the (Hindu) marriage ceremony at 6:30pm. We were escorted to the front of the tent where the ceremony was being held, and were seated in the first row on the left-hand side (where the bride’s parents would sit in a wedding back in the States). We were definitely treated like guests of honor. Not everyone showed up exactly at 6:30, but by the time the wedding ended, there were 1,200 people there. Naveen and his bride, Kranthi, were both seated on the stage at the front of the wedding tent. About 40 family members were seated around them on stage – with many of them coming and going throughout the ceremony to greet guests as they arrived.



I have no idea what the priest was saying/reading/doing since I don’t speak Telugu, Hindi, or Sanskrit, but the marriage rites lasted about 2 hours. There was a band of traditional Indian musicians that played every 10 minutes or so as the priest directed them. Then, after the marriage rites were concluded, there was a receiving line where Naveen and Kranthi stood on the stage, while the guests filed past them and sprinkled rice and flowers on their heads as a blessing. It appeared that less-important guests filed past first, with more important people coming towards the end. Many of the people who came through at the end paused to have a picture taken with the couple. We were told to wait until near the end at which time Naveen’s father personally escorted us up to the couple. Here are our pictures with them.

After the ceremony, and after going through the receiving line, we went back to another nearby tent for dinner. There were two tents for the reception, one of which had seating and the other of which had all of the buffet items – salads, Indian food, Chinese food, Thai food, desserts, and even ice cream, cotton candy, and popcorn for kids. Here are a few pictures of the “reception”. We left the reception at about 11pm.

Day 2 – Thursday – The Puja
On this day, we went to the “puja” – a religious ceremony at Naveen’s home. We sat around and visited with Naveen and his family for about 30 minutes before the puja started. They had a priest come to the home who told stories about their gods, and then instructed Naveen and Kranthi about how to be a good husband and a good wife. After this, Naveen, Kranthi, their families, and the guests burned incense and presented offerings (flowers, rice, coconuts, fruit) to their family god. The puja lasted from about 10:00am to 1pm. Here are some pictures.









After the puja, everyone went outside for more photos with the couple and for some food. They had the entire street in front of their villa blocked off and a tent erected for the party (maybe 50 yards long and stretching across the street). There were some people that came both Wednesday night and Thursday, but all told, there were about 1,600 people who came to the wedding, the puja, or both. Here are some more pictures.

One of the best parts of the day was that Naveen and his family got us some traditional Indian wedding clothes which they presented to us in a quick but formal ceremony. I’m not sure what you call my outfit, but Cindy’s is a saree (or sari). We absolutely loved getting to wear the clothes and get our pictures taken with everyone. They couldn’t have picked better colors for either of us. We think that as much as we liked it, the Indians liked it even more. Many of them did not speak English but we picked up “wow”, “beautiful” and “lovely.” They were definitely excited to see us wearing their traditional dress.








Day 3 – Friday – Around Hyderabad
Naveen’s family prepared an itinerary for us on this day. It was nice to have someone who knew exactly where to go and what sites we should see. We started the morning at the Birla Mandir Hindu temple in Tirupati. The temple was a beautiful marble structure (which is apparently a replica of another, more famous temple about 700km away that is made of gold). After that, we went to the Charminar district of Hyderabad, the oldest part of the city.

Then, we went to the Golconda Fort and the Qutub Tombs. You may not have heard of these, but if you have ever seen photographs of India or movies set in the tropical part of India (i.e., none of the buildings you saw were the Taj Mahal), this is what you saw. It was gorgeous. Here are some photos.

After this, we went shopping. We never go shopping when we travel, never. Not when we went to China, not in Paris or London or New York or Montreal, but we did today. We went to a shop for Cindy to look at more sarees. She didn’t buy any more sarees, but she did find some bangles to go with the sari she was given for the wedding. After that, we went pearl-shopping (Hyderabad is a major center of the global pearl trade, with 9 out of every 10 pearls sold in the world passing through here on the way to retailers. The craftsmanship of the merchants who drill, string, and mount pearls here is world-renowned). Cindy found a great necklace and earrings for an insane price. We also went by a couple of bakeries to pick up some local goodies.

Then, on Friday night, we had one final wedding function to attend, a dinner with the bride’s family at a local hotel. As usual, the food was abundant and outstanding. Again, we were treated as honored guests.

Day 4 – Saturday – Hyderabad and then Home
We had breakfast with Maruti, a work associate of Cindy’s who lives in Dallas. It was just coincidence that he happened to be in Hyderabad on business. So after breakfast, we went around to a couple more stores to shop, then headed to the airport for the flight back home. after being delayed at the airport, we ended up back in Sharjah at around midnight.

We were expecting a great trip and it was even better than we could have hoped. We're already planning to head back to India in the near future.

Sin Bin

OK - so I think that most of you know that Muslims don't eat pork. And so most of you are probably wondering if it's possible to get bacon, sausage, and ham over here. The answer is yes. Grocery stores often have a "Pork Shop" or "Pork Room" that's separate from the rest of the store. It's generally very clearly marked (in English and Arabic) so that no Muslim would accidentally become unclean by entering or purchasing pork. Here's a picture from one store we've been to.

Ana bihki Arabi

by Cindy

We started Arabic classes this week. The honeymoon is over! They have some crazy consonant combinations as well as a lot of guttural sounds. And reading and writing from right to left, that is hard in and of itself. The University has two classes - "The Alphabet, Numbers and Writing" and "Conversational Arabic." I am taking both classes and Jeff is taking the reading and writing class. I have yet to study or do my homework for this week and class meets tomorrow night. I can already tell I am going to be a bad student. If only blogging about class actually counted as studying.

For the Alphabet class, we learned how to write and say the first three letters and how they link or connect to the other letters. There are 28 letters in the alphabet but each letter is different depending on whether it is in the initial, medial or final position or if it stands alone. In other words 28 * 4 = 112 letters. Honeymoon is over.

The conversation class is even more difficult. We are learning crazy sounds and we have to practice in class so the instructor can "grade" us on our performance. One of the first words we learned was btihki, which means "do you speak?" The issue is that there are no silent letters so you have to pronounce the b and t as well as the h and k together. It does not exactly roll off of your tongue. All in all it is a fun class and we laugh a lot. I know I will get out of it what I put into it so I need to go study. I will leave you with a joke I heard not long ago:

What do you call a person who speaks three languages?
Answer: Trilingual

What do you call a person who speaks two languages?
Answer: Bilingual

What do you call a person who speaks one language?
Answer: American.

Women

by Cindy

Many of you have had questions about women and the way women are treated and perceived. We definitely plan to pass along our insights on that. For now, just a personal experience on how women are treated.

The University has a wonderful system where you can get a lot of government documents (visas, driving licenses, etc.) on campus. One of the services they provide is a local Police Officer who comes to campus to process your drivers license. However, campus was closed for the week following Ramadan, and so Jeff and I decided we would set out for the local Traffic Office to get my license on our own. Our first attempt was unsuccessful as they were still closed for the holiday. We set our again a couple of days later and did better. When we walked in we immediately saw the "Ladies Services" room so I headed that way. Many public places have separate lines and/or rooms for women. Some in the West might regard this as discrimination, but over here, it's more like chivalry. Women shouldn't have to associate with men and should have a special line that (generally) moves faster than the men's line. That way they can return home quickly and minimize their exposure to the "hassles" of city life.

Since I was headed to "Ladies Services", this left me to take the journey on my own and Jeff could only sit in the lobby and wait. The windows are mirrored glass so he couldn't even see inside. The receptionist told me I needed to fill out a form, in Arabic, and once complete, they would process my license. I told her the obvious, "I don't know Arabic" and she told me "behind the building." They tell you these things and, right or wrong, I say "okay" and walk away. I figure that since I am an educated woman, I can figure this out.... I leave the women's area and find Jeff, "I need to go behind the building." Jeff points to an information desk and so I show that guy the form, tell him I need it in Arabic and ask him where I should go. "Behind the building, typist." I now have two sources telling me to go behind the building and now I think I am looking for a typist. Off I go - behind the building. Yep - there are four areas, all clearly labeled for Typing Services, so I choose the one for me - License. They speak great English, tell me the forms they need and then talk in Arabic about the price I should pay. It started at 10Dirhams, went to 15 Dirhams and they finally settled on 20 Dirhams ($5.45 - even if I was being overcharged, it's still no big deal). About 10 minutes later, I now have my form in hand and head back to the Ladies Services receptionist.

She points to the room across from her so I go get in line. I know I need to take a vision test to get my license and I see the big E on the wall so I assume I'm in the right place. The traffic Officer / Ambulance person working in this room is nice, her uncle lives in Texas and she hopes to visit on her next holiday. About 10 minutes later I pass my eye exam, get my blood typed (they do that everywhere here, not sure why) and she adds to my bundle of papers. I head back to the receptionist who this time points to her right. I go to that desk and she says, "no" and gestures even further right. I go to the next desk and receive a nod of approval. This lady takes my paperwork, tells me to sit down and spends the next 20 minutes texting and talking on her phone. She had an earpiece to her phone tucked behind her shaila (head scarf) so when her cell would ring, she would pick up her desk phone and hold it to the ear that didn't have the earpiece to act like she was talking on her desk phone (but it was really her cell phone). Then when she wanted to text, she would hold up a piece of paper to block everyone from seeing what she was doing. I just sat and watched and waited.

I thought I had brought all of the necessary paperwork with me - 1) a "no objection letter" from my husband, 2) two pictures, 3) passport with residence visa and 4) 140 Dirhams. The first thing she asked for was a piece of paper I didn't have - a copy of my sponsor's passport. So I head out to find Jeff and get his passport. She tells me she needs a copy of it and I can go back to the typist and pay them for a copy. Luckily Jeff already had a copy so I take that back to her. After more texting and talking, she hands me my paperwork and tells me to, "go next door, in the middle, to reception, get signature."

"Okay."

I find Jeff, we head next door. Next door turns out to be the men's area for licensing so I guess they assumed I didn't mind mixing with the opposite sex. We found a desk and the officer immediately helped me over all of the men crowding around. I said I needed "a signature" to which he responded "okay" and walked into the office behind the desk. About five minutes later another officer showed up, helped me first, and went looking for the first officer. In another three minutes, a third officer showed up, helped me first, and took off looking for the first two officers. He almost immediately returned and handed me my bundle of paperwork.

At this point, Jeff and I assume that I have what I need and I return to Ladies Services to hand off my paperwork to the texting worker. She again tells me to sit. Eventually she takes my money, 190 Dirhams (note that it is 50 more than I should have paid) and asks for my sponsor's phone number. She completes the transaction and both Jeff and I receive this text message.

She then sends me back to the receptionist to print my license. I wait for about 45 minutes for her to print it out but alas, after paying a little more than I should have, I am a legal driver in the UAE!

New Car

by Cindy (and some by Jeff)

Jeff and I were convinced that we would get a SUV once we arrived in Dubai. If you know anything about how they drive over here, the more metal around you the better off you will be. We were so convinced that we drove several SUVs before we left the States so that we could pull the trigger pretty quickly once we arrived.

Once we got over here, we found that the models of cars here are not exactly the same as the models of cars in the USA. Plus, there can be a significant difference in the pricing, depending on the car. We had assumed that things would be cheaper over here - based on what several friends had told us and what we had read online. This wasn't necessarily so.

For instance, we thought that we were interested in getting a Toyota Prado. It's an SUV that isn't sold in the States by Toyota. In the US, it's the Lexus GX. Same vehicle - same frame, styling, options, ride, etc. Everything - same. So we thought, "Wow, the Lexus GX is a great vehicle; the Prado should be about $10K less in the UAE since it has a Toyota badge on it instead of the 'L'." We had pretty much made up our minds about this vehicle before we moved. We just needed to find a dealership and write a check.





Nice, huh? Only there was no discount for buying a Toyota rather than a Lexus. Everybody wants a white SUV over here. And the Prado is more or less at the top of the heap (until you move up to Range Rovers and BMWs).

So at this point, Jeff got anxious about the Prado because of price (same as a Lexus back in the States) and Cindy wasn't crazy about some of the options (What - no keyless entry?). So then Jeff started thinking used, and Cindy started thinking about other SUVs, and our agreement fizzled into argument. [not bad arguments, just mild ones - don't worry, we're fine - this story has a happy ending - keep reading].

Anyhow, after disagreements about options, styling of vehicles, prices, etc., etc., Jeff and I were at an impasse - we could not agree on which SUV to get. So we dropped the SUV altogether and went back to sedans. We liked our car in Lubbock and so we started looking around for similar vehicles.

We landed on a used 2009 Volvo S80. We were fortunate that it only had 10,000 Kms (6,000 miles) on it. It even still smells new. We were totally hooked when we got a whiff of the new car smell. It seems that a British expat owned it and for whatever reason, had to sell it right after s/he bought it. We are happy to be the new owners and while it is not as big or dominating as an SUV, it is safe!







As you can see, it's a steel gray color. It has a tan interior and all of the bells and whistles. We love it. Come visit us, and we will take you for a ride.